Oh the conflict of the human nature to expect miracles yet to have expectations often leads to disappointment. During my periods of severe anxiety and almost OCD behaviour, I would have to control everything. I could not cope if a plan changed or if someone did not behave the way I would have expected someone to behave.
It took me a long time to realise that it was my expectations that usually lead to disappointment. Not communicating my needs and desires effectively. You see, I think, we often believe others should know what we're thinking. This is especially true in relationships. We get upset by our partners behaviour or lack of understanding. But have we really explained what we need?
I openly admit I am a dreamer, I look for the best in people. I expect people to behave with the same moral codes and standards as me. I thought all people would join in my crazy positive approaches, finding solutions and come join me in the path of the dreamer. This has been, the learning point for me. We have no control over another’s thoughts, emotions or behaviours. In fact the more we try to impose our beliefs, standards or opinions the more the other person moves away.
The world needs balance, it needs the realists. They are the grounding force. The ying to the yang, the black to the white.
I’m sure my positive and can do attitude has pissed a lot of people off along the way. I know the attitudes of others has upset and hurt me, dampening spirits and causing me to bump down from floating on my cloud. But it isn’t others to blame or assign fault to. I need to look at my own thoughts and behaviours.
When I reverse this and begin to look at myself, my own expectations. It’s easy to see where my anxiety feeds. I have such strong and powerful expectations on myself, to be all the things. Do you think you can be all the things and do all the things? Oh wow the battle with myself is real. Moving from the dreamer and freedom seeker to the striver and deliverer. I realise as I type this, that I am, my own ying and yang, light and dark.
What about you? Are your expectations on yourself realistic? Do you over zealously push and push? Or do you sit back thinking your not worthy of growth? Do you believe in that grounding force?
I believe the grounding is there to protect us. Protect us from disappointment and upset. But what if this protecting force is stronger than the light. What then? If we follow the darkness we remain stuck, never evolving or growing. In fact maybe even dying a little as our dreams and goals disappear. We feel trapped and we can no longer see the potential of the life we deserve and can have. Often staying in situations which make our hearts and souls unhappy. Expecting miracles is not a flaw. Expecting miracles gives us hope and light, during dark and difficult times. It’s not being naive its, being and believing in the possibilities of life.
The flaw in expecting miracles only comes when we try to control the miracle. To create our own version of the miracle and not being open to accept it in different ways. Do you control the outcome or only see one solution? Miracles are exactly that, almost beyond imagination, something wonderful, surprising and joyous.
Lets live in the belief, the wonder and joy. Expect surprises and miracles, but the beauty is the surrender into the unknown. Letting go, allowing life to flow. So today I am going to be in the joy and allow the miracles to unfold not how I intend them, but however God, the Universe, Angels and my higher force decide.
“Only when we Surrender can the Miracle occur. “
Love and Live Your Light